In mid-September last year, I was in full-on wedding mode, counting down the days until The Big Day and trying to finish every last detail on my to-do list. Naturally, that included a little maintenance on my eyebrows to make sure I wouldn’t stroll down the aisle looking like Eugene Levy.
Now, I don’t know why I thought it was a good idea to do what I did next. But for some reason, I decided that I had outrageous sideburns and that they simply needed to go before the wedding. This curious line of thinking led me to a website for a spa in downtown Toronto that specializes in threading—a form of hair removal wherein an esthetician tortures you with a piece of string. It started with my eyebrows, but then, in some kind of pre-wedding state of delirium, I found myself saying, “Actually, can I get the entire face done, please?”
That’s right. Two weeks before my wedding, I decided to have every bit of peach fuzz removed from my face by a complete stranger, wielding a piece of thread that may as well have been made of barbed wire. Now, you’re probably thinking, “But Alicia, doesn’t that feel like a cheese grater on your face?” And the answer is yes, friends. Yes it does.
So when the esthetician asks you what the special occasion is for all this hair removal, and you say, “Oh, I’m getting married in two weeks” and she says, “What?! Married?! You need a facial!” you should likely say thank you, but no, as there is nothing in your pores that needs to be removed, seeing as how you’ve just had hair ripped from every. Single. One. Or, in a pre-wedding state of delirium, you could find yourself saying “that sounds great!” and smiling and nodding your way right into a “deep clean” facial.
And then you leave the spa looking like this…
Check the rosy glow!
On the plus side, I definitely didn’t look like Bert when I walked down the aisle! And hey, it’s another thing off my list. Next time, though, I think I’ll just skip the razor string and go right for a nice soothing facial instead. Aromatherapy, anyone?